Happy Birthday Gerome
by Anonymous Contributer
Summary: Today is Gerome's birthday, and he wants no part of it. Sucks to be him though, because the Shepherds love to party, and their eccentric tactician/Gerome's father won't let him spend it any other way. It might not be all bad though, there's at least a certain blue-haired beauty to help perk up his spirits.


**Hey everybody, it's Gerome's birthday!...Three months ago. Yeah, this was a oneshot idea I've been wanting to do for a while, but work, laziness, video games, and procrastination got in the way. But better late than never right? And besides, it's not like anyone else is making birthday fics for other characters on their birthdays (at least for those not named Lucina). I wanted to do this because I feel Gerome needs more love (which is weird since he's basically Batman. How is he not receiving all the love!?) and there's barely any Gerome/Lucina fics on this site. I also wanted to write something different from all the "Fire Emblem" fics that are all the rage in this section. To give you an idea on what I mean, this story doesn't have the Robin/Lucina pairing (though that doesn't mean it's a bad pairing. Hell, the most well-written stories here are about shipping those two). It also reminds you that you can customize the Avatar beyond the standard default Robin (his name's not even Robin here) and that there are other possible pairings in the game (spoiler alert: Chrom/Sumia isn't here folks). So sit back and try to enjoy this new blasphemous idea I'm trying out. And if enough people like this (which I'm too cynical to actually believe will happen), I might actually start a chapter-story with this couple that I've had in mind. It would give me a good excuse to get back into actively writing again. Oh right there's a fanfic you want to read. I'll shut up now.**

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><p>Happy Birthday Gerome<p>

Rating: T for mild sexual references.

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><p>It's a nice day at the Shepherd's camp. The skies were clear, the sun was shining, and some birds could be heard singing happily. This was in direct contrast to the Masked Rider walking around the campgrounds. While it's perfectly normal to see Gerome skulking about aloofly, today he was slightly more frustrated than usual on account of one fact.<p>

Today was his birthday.

Sure there may have been a time when he actually enjoyed his birthday, but that was back when he was much younger and more naïve, and before the loss of both his parents and an apocalyptic nightmare spread over the world. Now his birthday means nothing more than being one year closer to death, and with the revival of Grima looming on the horizon, it might be pretty soon. Unfortunately for Gerome, the Shepherds' just love to celebrate when it's someone's birthday. He always found them to be pointless and a waste of time, something they can afford less and less. They should be focused more on preparing for the inevitable resurrection of the Fell Dragon; not on reveling on the day one of them was born.

Speaking of which, Gerome was loathing what they were planning to do for his birthday. No doubt his friends and family, especially the more annoyingly peppy ones like Inigo, Owain, Cynthia, and his sister, are probably planning something so outrageously extravagant just to attempt to make him smile. Sometimes he feels they do these sorts of things to him just to torture him for the fun of it. Well he wanted no part of this. He just wants to get on with this day as he normally would. Get something to eat, train alone, take care of Minervykins-

"Hey Gerome!"

Gerome sighed in annoyance as he recognized the voice calling him from behind. He grew even more irritated when the expected arm wrapped around him. He turned his head to see his father Mikal, the wide-eyed, spiky purple-haired tactician of the army. He was always trying to spend "father-son quality time" so they can bond. As far as he was concerned, his real father died in the future and this one in the present has no connection or meaning to him.

Or at least that's what he keeps telling himself. More often than not, his attempts to distance himself from his parents tend to fail and he begins to accept them as his real ones. It doesn't change the fact that his father can be annoyingly persistent.

"So how's the birthday boy doing?" Mikal gleefully asked.

It was taking Gerome a lot of willpower not to push his father's arm off him. "I was fine, until you showed up." Gerome answered.

"Aw come on, I just want to make sure my son is enjoying his special day." said Mikal.

"There is nothing special about today. Now leave me be!"

"Oh come on! You don't want to do anything special for your birthday? No feast? No hanging out at a pub with your beloved father?"

Gerome was really losing his patience now. "You are not my father and I wish to do no such activities with anyone."

Mikal smirked. "Not even with Lucina?"

Gerome was caught off guard with that comment (although it really shouldn't, he knows his father well enough) and blushed. Lucina, his girlfriend, the love of his life, and the only person whose company he (constantly) enjoys. He's been infatuated with her since they were childhood friends, and when she admitted she's held the same feelings about him, it was the happiest moment of his life. Although Gerome's still not sure if they can truly defeat the Fell Dragon and change destiny, if they succeed, he hopes to marry Lucina and spend the rest of their days in Wyvern Valley.

That probably wasn't going to happen though as she would most likely take up the Exalt title and be the next ruler of Ylisse. It's for the best really as she is of the exalted bloodline and would be the next best ruler after Chrom. Her flirtatious brother certainly was no rightful king. Plus Gerome can still marry her, so everybody wins.

"Oh ho ho, got your attention now didn't I?" piped up Mikal.

Gerome snapped back to reality. However, his blush didn't fade. "Sh-Shut Up!" His father was trying so hard not to snicker.

"Seriously? All I have to do is mention your girlfriend to get you to drop the cool guy act?" Gerome gritted his teeth, but still hadn't stopped blushing. "I hope you two have been keeping your hands to yourselves. Which reminds me, do I need to have 'the talk' with you?"

"What me and Lucina do when we're together is none of your business!"

"Actually, it is my business. I don't know if I want to be a grandfather this young." The tactician's teasing grin knew no bounds.

Gerome is no idiot. He knew his father was just trying to get a rise out of him. Mikal really did approve of Gerome and Lucina's relationship. The two future children had a lot in common, including being some of the most serious and worried about Grima's revival. Now that they've admitted that they've loved each other since the beginning, they've had much less thoughts of despair to the point of Gerome actually smiles on occasions. Mikal couldn't be happier for his son.

Gerome also suspects his father approved of their relationship because it gives him more material to embarrass him with.

"Besides, it's not me you should be worried about." Mikal continued. "What would Chrom do if he found out you knocked up his 'widdle girl'?"

That got a visible flinch out of the Masked Rider. It's no secret that the Exalt can be a "little" overprotective about his daughter. When Chrom found out that Gerome was dating Lucina, he made sure to have a talk with the tactician's son. Now Gerome was not an easy person to frighten, but after that meeting, he would put an angry Chrom on par with the Fell Dragon himself.

Snapping out of his brief funk, Gerome finally decided to acknowledge his father. "Is there any reason you're being more annoying than usual?"

Mikal gave a nonchalant shrug before replying. "Just hoping to have a nice breakfast with my dear son to start off his birthday."

The tactician's son quirked an eyebrow underneath his mask. His father's teasing usually lasts at least 5 times longer (or at least that's how it always felt to Gerome). Naturally this made him somewhat suspicious.

"Why are you giving me that weird look that I imagine you're giving me under that mask? Is it so weird for a father to spend some_"

"There's a surprise party for me in the Mess Tent isn't there?"

"What!?" Mikal began to exaggerate surprise. "Noooooo! Of course not!" Gerome looked unconvinced until his father spoke in a normal tone. "It's in the War Council Tent."

"Wait, what?"

"Yeah. The surprise party is in the war tent." reaffirmed Mikal in the same plain manner.

Now Gerome was really confused as to what's going on. "And you're just…telling me this?"

All silliness was wiped from Mikal's attitude at that moment. "Look, I know I like to mess with you a lot, but I am still your father. I know how much you hate surprises, so the least I can do is tell you about the party and know what's coming."

"You couldn't have just not had a party in the first place?"

"I tried, believe me I did. But the Shepherds insisted. They love to party whenever they can. So I figured I can save you some trouble and buy you a few quiet moments before you're surrounded by annoying drunks, loudmouth idiots, and annoying drunk loudmouth idiots."

Gerome was stunned. He had no idea his father could actually be a reasonable human being. Okay maybe his bitterness over all the incessant ribbing was clouding his judgment, but it was very rare for Mikal to be serious and respect his son's desires. Maybe Gerome pegged his father all wrong all this time.

"Well then." Gerome spoke after recomposing himself. "I suppose a 'father-son breakfast' would be a good way to start my birthday."

Mikal gave his son a sincere, non-playful smirk. "I'd like that."

The two purple-haired family members continued to the Mess Tent. Sure it would be a pain for Gerome when he's forced to attend his own unwanted birthday party, but thanks to his father's warning, maybe he could plan out a way to escape early and_

"**SURPRISE!**"

The masked man was scared out of his thoughts the moment he entered the Mess Tent.

"**HAPPY BIRTHDAY GEROME!**"

There in the tent were all of the Shepherds, a large cake, and even some presents. There was no doubt about it, this was his surprise party.

"WHAT THE_?" Gerome looked at his father accusingly. "You said the party was in the War Council Tent!"

"Yeah, I lied." Mikal smirked. "I'm the Master Tactician, remember?"

Forget what Gerome thought earlier. His father is an ass, and always will be an ass.

"Happy Birthday bro!" a chipper voice called out. The birthday boy turned to see his mother Cherche and his younger sister Morgan heading towards him. Looking past them, he could see every other Shepherd start to mingle and booze it up, seemingly having no intentions to interact with him anymore. While grateful that it looks like he'll have as little involvement as possible in this get-together, Gerome couldn't help but wonder why they would even bother throwing him a party if they really didn't care?

Pushing that thought aside, he grunted a response to Morgan. "Happy for you maybe. To me it's a pointless waste of time and resources."

"He might have a point there." Mikal spoke up. "We are draining our precious resource of ale. How are we gonna fight to our fullest if we're sober on the battlefield?"

Gerome gave an annoyed huff at the joke in contrast to Cherche and Morgan's laughing. The former female composed herself before speaking to her son. "Now, now. You spend the other 364 days brooding. Today is the one day you should be excited."

"Oh he will be mother." chirped Morgan. "He's always 'excited' when Lucina's around." Gerome's cheeks turned pink, sending the girls into another laughing fit with his father joining them as well. "But hey, if you really want a reason to stay miserable, this isn't the birthday when you were actually born yet."

Now Gerome was really flustered and couldn't help but sputter his next phrase. "W-WHAT!? W-Why would even care at all about that, let alone bring it up in public!?"

"Hey I just wanna make sure we don't screw up the timeline too badly and live in a world with no big brother to tease." Morgan shrugged nonchalantly.

Her brother began to grunt a response. "Well you don't have to worry. The day that I am born isn't until…" he paused when he realized what all of this meant. "…next year…from now."

He and Morgan slowly rotated their heads to look at their parents. They in turn looked at each other before giving off suggestive smirks.

"Sooo…you wanna meet up again 3 months from now?" Mikal flirted with his wife.

"I'll bring my best lingerie if you bring yours." Cherche joked in a similar tone.

"Oh Naga." Gerome prayed that no one was eavesdropping on them.

"Anyways, I figured I might as well give you your birthday present now." Morgan whipped out a bunch of cards from her coat and handed them to her brother. "Here ya go."

The cards were covered in cute, childish drawings and text that read stuff like "ONE TIME COOKING DUTY" and "ONE FREE MINERVA CLEANING SERVICE".

"What exactly are these?"

"They're chore coupons! Whenever you're assigned a chore and you don't feel like doing it, just give me the corresponding coupon and let your wonderful sister take care of it for you."

Gerome honestly didn't mind performing any of his assigned duties, and in fact would rather do anything involving taking care of Minerva by himself. Nevertheless, he understood his sister meant well and politely thanked her.

"Aww, it was nothing big bro!" She gave her brother a nice hug. "And spoiler alert, I can guarantee my gift is a lot better than Father's."

"Hey the only reason that would be true is because your mother wouldn't let me give you my original gift! But she was adamant that I couldn't give you any condoms!"

This has to be a new record for the amount of times Gerome has blushed in one day. Who in their right mind would give someone condoms for their birthday (and to their son no less)!?

"And I remain by that decision." stated Cherche. "If our son wants to have safe sex with his lovely girlfriend, he has to buy them himself."

Gerome _really_ prayed that no one was eavesdropping on them.

"And how is the birthday boy holding up?"

The four family members turned to see the speaker was none other than Inigo with whom else, but his sister Lucina walking alongside him. Gerome couldn't tell if Naga was being merciful or merciless with him today.

"Well considering how much blood is rushing to his face from all our family teasing," Mikal began. "I wouldn't be surprised if his face turned permanently red."

Gerome glared at his smiling father while Lucina just held a worried look.

"Is that going to be a problem!? Is that hazardous for his health!? Should I get Aunt Lissa!?"

"Relax sis." Inigo tried to calm her down. "It was just a joke." Lucina just ended up embarrassed for not understanding a joke…again.

"She tries so hard." Cherche noted out loud.

"Well I think we oughta leave the two lovebirds alone." began Mikal. "Just both of you try to keep your hands to yourself. After all, Chrom is _always_ watching."

This time, both Gerome and Lucina were flushed and nervous over the tactician's implications. Fortunately, he and the rest of his family left the Masked Rider and the royal siblings alone so they could partake in more of the festivities.

"So how are you enjoying the party Gerome?" asked Inigo, acting as if no embarrassing event just took place.

"I would be enjoying it if it didn't exist in the first place."

"Oh come on now. You need to learn to appreciate these things and have a little fun. It also wouldn't hurt if you'd smile every now and again. If you want, I'll even give you lessons like I have been doing with Lucy."

Pushing aside the question of "Why would you be giving Lucina 'smiling lessons'?", Gerome figured he asked what he felt most needed to be answered.

"You know I detest social gatherings like this. Why go through all the trouble of having a party for me?"

Inigo smirked. "I seem to recall back in our childhood a young boy who was always excited for his birthday. He was always happy to see all his friends, open his presents, and eat cake before Nah's father would steal half of it."

Gerome scoffed. "That was back when 'good times' were still possible for us. Besides, hardly anyone here seems to care that this party is supposed to be for me. In fact, I think they're blissfully unaware of what's going on around them."

"Well to be fair, you haven't done anything to get to know most of these people. And even though this is 'your day', you have to let others have some fun you know."

"Can we really afford to have fun with Grima looming on the horizon?"

Inigo's face took on a serious look. "As a matter of fact, there's no better time to be having fun than now. All work and no play makes for poor soldiers."

"You can't possibly be serious."

"Oh but I am." The philanderer affirmed. "Gerome, back in our future, when was the last time you saw people relishing life because there was something to be joyful about? When was the last time you saw anything other than misery or death? If anything, this party serves as a reminder to what we're fighting for." The resolution in his eyes caught Gerome off guard. "We're here to reclaim the happy lives that we all lost, so we can once again relive glorious moments like this!"

This birthday was full of surprises. Since when did Inigo make articulate speeches and use them as convincing arguments?

Said man turned up the corners of his lips into a small, sad smile. "I always had to put on a smile to give everyone hope, even if it might've been false. But now, neither I, nor anyone else, no longer have to act. I am genuinely happy for all that we have, and will accomplish."

Gerome actually took these words to heart and looked closer at the Shepherds' behavior. There was definitely truth to the skirt-chaser's words. All of his friends from their bleak future were having the time of their lives. Something he hasn't seen from them since their childhood. Laurent and his mother were not taking notes of everyone's social behaviors, and instead were being entertained by Laurent's death-obsessed father's magic parlor tricks. Nah was actually playing a game with her mother, something she always claimed to be childish. Even Noire, who always seemed so depressed, was seen grinning and connecting with Tharja.

Inigo had a point. This party wasn't just for him; it was just as, if not more, important for everyone else.

"Sorry for the sentimental speech." Inigo sheepishly spoke. "I've clearly been hanging around with Owain too much."

"If that were true, no one would've taken you seriously." The birthday boy actually gave his friend a small smile. "Maybe there is a point to these celebrations after all."

"I'm glad my words haven't fallen on deaf ears. Enjoy the rest of your birthday! If you need me, I'll be chatting up the ladies." And with that, Inigo was off to go flirt, and will probably receive a slap to the face (at best) for his efforts.

"I too am glad that you see it his way." Lucina spoke up. Gerome almost forgot she was with them the whole time. "It saves me the trouble of trying to convince you myself."

"You would have succeeded. Even more so in fact, considering how much I love to listen to your melodic voice."

Lucina turned red at his compliment. "It seems _you've_ clearly been hanging around my brother too much."

Gerome frowned at this. "Not by my choice. He keeps insisting I tag along with him on his excursions and be his 'wingman'."

Then Gerome realized he shouldn't have said that as his girlfriend was glaring hard at Inigo from across the room. "I _**really**_ wish he would stop getting you involved."

Now no one was perfect, but Lucina had a problem when another woman would throw themselves at her boyfriend. Sure any normal person would get upset at this, but Lucina's issue was that she would get **violent.** How so? One woman tried to serenade Gerome outside his tent at night within earshot of the future Exalt. The next morning, there was a red stain outside Gerome's tent and the woman never bothered him again.

She was definitely her father's daughter. Just like Chrom didn't want any man near his little girl, Lucina didn't want any woman near her man.

Gerome cleared his throat to get Lucina out of her angry trance. "O-oh…um…" the princess stuttered. "A-anyways, I wanted to give you this." She pulled out a small present and handed it over.

The Masked Rider looked over the gift with an appreciative glance. "You didn't have to get me anything."

"I wanted to. In fact, this is something I've been meaning to give you for quite some time. Now it seems like a perfect time as any."

Gerome unwrapped the gift to reveal a small box. When he opened it, he was shocked at what was inside. It looked like half of a metal butterfly wing with a circular chain connected to it.

"It's the mask you gave me before we set out to this past." Lucina explained. "Or at least half of it. I turned it into a necklace."

Gerome was still stunned over his gift. "You…kept it all this time?"

"Of course I did. It really helped me conceal my identity when we set out to the past. And even though it broke, I couldn't have just gotten rid of it." Lucina began to look downcast. "If by some horrible chance we would never see each other again in this time, I would at least have this mask to remember you by." She then traded in her upset composure for a nervous one, complete with finger twiddling. "Sooo…do you like it?"

Gerome smiled and wore his new present around his neck. "It's the second most precious treasure I've ever laid eyes on." He sure knows how to charm the bluenette if her beet red face was anything to go by. "Though I am curious about what happened to the other half of the mask."

"Oh, I have it." Lucina brought a hand to her neck and pulled out her own necklace that she was wearing, once again surprising Gerome due to her sweet gesture. "I heard somewhere that couples have matching jewelry to show that they're…well…couples. And since this mask has so much sentimental value_mmph!"

The princess's lips were silenced once her boyfriend put his over hers. She got over her shock quickly and melted into the kiss. They were like that for quite some time before they had to part for air, leaving both of their faces a nice shade of scarlet.

"Not that I didn't love that," Lucina spoke first. "But why_"

"I…got caught up in the moment is all." Gerome admitted sheepishly. "What with the matching couple's necklaces and the intimate feelings being shared, I felt I should show you my appreciation."

"You're very much welcome. However…" Lucina smirked. "You do know my father could be watching us, right?"

Gerome smirked as well. "I'm a year older now. I should be mature enough to not fear him over something so trivial." However, in his mind he was thinking 'Crap! CRAP! **CRAP!** I can't believe I forgot about Chrom! I have got to get out of here quick! But I might as well not leave alone.'

"While I am grateful for all you and the Shepherds have done for me, I would rather spend my birthday with a quiet evening. So…" Gerome took off his signature mask and looked directly into Lucina's eyes. "Would you mind accompanying me?"

She would've said yes anyways, but seeing his handsome face in full detail always made her comply, along with making her face feel like it's melting. She clearly needs to fix that in the future. Can't have her man always having this much power over her.

"I'm not much one for parties myself. Let's go." She gave Gerome a peck on his lips before the two snuck out of the Mess Tent, hoping no one saw them.

Unfortunately, four pairs of eyes did notice them. And they just so happen to belong to the parents of the lovebirds, gathered around at the same table.

"I don't like this." Chrom bluntly stated, glaring at where his daughter and her boyfriend left.

"It's fine." Mikal tried to reassure nonchalantly.

"It's not fine at all! How can I be sure nothing funny will go on between them while we're not around!?"

"Okay first of all, Gerome's a good kid. He wouldn't do such a thing until they're married, as per the contract you threatened him to sign."

Olivia looked to her husband with a questioned expression. "It was a necessary arrangement." Chrom assured.

"And second, don't you think you should be worried about your own son doing the same to the women here?"

"INIGO WOULD NEVER!" shouted Olivia. "He may…fraternize a bit, but he would never take advantage of a girl!"

"And our son's the same." Cherche assured. "He would never do anything that would make Lucina uncomfortable." She then gave a teasing grin. "And we hope Lucina would be the same towards Gerome."

"Of course she would." affirmed Chrom.

"I don't know." Mikal had a mischievous smirk of his own. "If she takes after her mother and father…"

Chrom narrowed his eyes at the tactician. "What exactly are you implying?"

"Y-yes, wh-what indeed?" stuttered Olivia.

"I seem to recall a certain Exalt and dancer waking up the entire palace_"

"For Naga's sake Mikal! I don't need you to recount that moment everytime!" Though Chrom was annoyed, he at least had the decency to blush profusely over his sexual escapade.

"You're actually right this time Chrom. According to Cherche, Minerva doesn't want me talking about it unless she's around."

"She always finds it amusing that Olivia of all people would demand that you 'let her ride you like a wyvern'." explained Cherche.

Well this is just what Chrom needed right now. The knowledge of a dragon laughing at him and a wife that looked ready to faint from embarrassment.

"You shy ones are always the kinkiest, huh Olivia?"

"Okay Mikal enough! Get to the point you were making."

"My point is, it probably wouldn't be too hard for Gerome to get Lucina's consent. In fact, she might even be the first to offer_"

"You. Take. That. Back." Chrom threatened.

Mikal simply laughed at his friend's behavior, which in this context, could be seen as flirting death. "Relax Chrom. I'm just screwing with you. You know how I am."

The Exalt visibly calmed down, but was still clearly annoyed. "Unfortunately I do." He put his head in one hand, let out a sigh, and muttered "I need a new best friend."

"Regardless of Mikal's teasing," began Olivia. "I have to agree with him and Cherche. We should leave Lucina and Gerome be. After all, they've never been happier since they got together."

"I know, I know." Chrom sighed. "I just…wish I could've been the one to make her that happy."

"Oh gross Chrom!" the tactician started to joke. "That's super creepy! I mean that's your daughter!"

"Oh ha ha." the Exalt sarcastically responded. "You know what I meant. I just feel like she's growing up too fast and growing apart from me."

"Um…she was already grown up to begin with." reminded Mikal. "Besides, you already have a baby Lucina you can spend the next 20 or years to raise."

"Not only that," Cherche spoke. "I can guarantee you that Lucina will never grow apart from you two. She speaks nothing but praise and admiration about her parents, and wants to make up for lost time. That's certainly more than we can say about our son's feelings towards us."

"I wouldn't worry about our son. Underneath that tough guy exterior, he's a big softie. We all saw how he just was with the royal brats."

Ignoring his friend's teasing comment about his "bratty children", Chrom managed to look at peace with the whole situation. "You're right. And I can't wait for all of this to be over, so I can spend those years raising my daughter."

Olivia smiled at her husband. "I look forward to that as well."

"See? It's fine." stated Mikal. "So let's chill out, drink our booze, and not think about how much our children are making out right now."

And just like that, Chrom was pissed again. "If I see even one hickey on Lucina_"

"You mean like that one on your wife?"

"EEK!?" shrieked Olivia. She turned to her husband. "You promised no one would notice!"

"I'm only kidding Olivia." laughed Mikal. "And for future reference, if there was a hickey or other related sex marking, everyone would notice since we can practically see _everything_ through that outfit."

"But since you mentioned it," Cherche teased. "What have you and Chrom been doing for you to try and hide a hickey?"

As the dancer tried to sputter out an explanation out of her predicament, only one thought was going through Chrom's mind.

'I _really_ need a new best friend.'

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><p><strong>And there you have it! Hope that pleasantly killed your boredom for a while (pleasantly killed. As if that's a thing that could happen *laughs*). And just a reminder, if you liked it, I might be persuaded to write more often. And if you don't care for more stories like this or "Honest Trailers" parodies (which I do have more ideas for), than just encourage me to write more often so I'll be less likely to rage at this website whenever I upload a story because I get confused how to do so because it's been so long between each upload. That's all for now. Happy Holidays everyone!<strong>


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